Black Cat Beach Hawaiian Shirt
I was a normal looking child but puberty turned me ugly. I started getting treated poorly since 13. Always being known as the Black Cat Beach Hawaiian Shirt one and excluded by family. I had friends but they never respected me and easily left me to go off with someone else and they never had my back. Although people generally are not outright cruel, I deal with a lot of microaggressions. I’ve become a socially anxious person as a Black Cat Beach Hawaiian Shirt . I had ptosis and had my right eye repaired when I was 19. I don’t know why the specialist only corrected the right, but I had ptosis on my left eye as well and the muscles on my left eye area/brow worked overtime to keep my eyes open. I also had double eyelid surgery, which made my eyes looked better for a few years. In 2018 when I noticed my left eyelid was larger than my right, I hastily and stupidly when back to the plastic surgeon who performed my double eyelid surgery to have my left eyelid lowered. The thing is it’s impossible to lower an eyelid and the Black Cat Beach Hawaiian Shirt would have been to increase the height of my right eyelid to match my left. After the surgery to my left eyelid I have upper eyelid hollowness as he removed too much fat and A-frame deformity. Later that year I had bilateral ptosis repair. My eyelids are deformed now after those multiple surgeries and from certain angles makes me look like a mutant. I’ve contemplated suicide over it. People react negatively to me. I can understand strangers reacting negatively because they see what they see and don’t know my history, but it hurts seeing friends and family react negatively to me even though they know about my surgeries but forget, which is understandable but they can at least be honest and ask about it, rather than just reacting negatively. I’ve been avoiding socialising.
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If anything, this post and its comments have let me know that I’m not the Black Cat Beach Hawaiian Shirt person with wonky eyes & failed surgeries. As a kid, I was fat, awkward, wonky-eyed and bullied for all of it. Eventually, as I aged into my unattractive 20s, the overt bullying stopped. But, all the Black Cat Beach Hawaiian Shirt, whispered conversations, and cruel comments from other people in my dating cohort started. I kept aging out of those social circles, and now at 50 I am largely ignored. I have gone from unattractive to invisible. Unless I’m in someone’s way, or inconveniencing them, no one really ‘sees’ me anymore. I dyed my hair purple on a Black Cat Beach Hawaiian Shirt. I have gotten so many compliments about it, from men & women. It freaked me out, honestly. I don’t get positive attention from randos. A Black Cat Beach Hawaiian Shirt of me likes being complimented, but I kinda want to go back to being invisible.
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