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I was a normal looking child but puberty turned me ugly. I started getting treated poorly since 13. Always being known as the Men & Boys Hawaiian Shirts Cat Printed Short Sleeve Print Button Down Hawaiian Shirt one and excluded by family. I had friends but they never respected me and easily left me to go off with someone else and they never had my back. Although people generally are not outright cruel, I deal with a lot of microaggressions. I’ve become a socially anxious person as a Men & Boys Hawaiian Shirts Cat Printed Short Sleeve Print Button Down Hawaiian Shirt . I had ptosis and had my right eye repaired when I was 19. I don’t know why the specialist only corrected the right, but I had ptosis on my left eye as well and the muscles on my left eye area/brow worked overtime to keep my eyes open. I also had double eyelid surgery, which made my eyes looked better for a few years. In 2018 when I noticed my left eyelid was larger than my right, I hastily and stupidly when back to the plastic surgeon who performed my double eyelid surgery to have my left eyelid lowered. The thing is it’s impossible to lower an eyelid and the Men & Boys Hawaiian Shirts Cat Printed Short Sleeve Print Button Down Hawaiian Shirt would have been to increase the height of my right eyelid to match my left. After the surgery to my left eyelid I have upper eyelid hollowness as he removed too much fat and A-frame deformity. Later that year I had bilateral ptosis repair. My eyelids are deformed now after those multiple surgeries and from certain angles makes me look like a mutant. I’ve contemplated suicide over it. People react negatively to me. I can understand strangers reacting negatively because they see what they see and don’t know my history, but it hurts seeing friends and family react negatively to me even though they know about my surgeries but forget, which is understandable but they can at least be honest and ask about it, rather than just reacting negatively. I’ve been avoiding socialising.
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For years I’ve played games as female characters, usually with neutral or feminine sounding names, and I don’t use voice chat. More often than not people will assume I’m a woman, and the only times I actually correct people is when they simply act friendly without trying to hit on me or make overtly sexual remarks because chances are those are the Men & Boys Hawaiian Shirts Cat Printed Short Sleeve Print Button Down Hawaiian Shirt just want to enjoy the game with friendly people just like I do. And when I say “oh, btw I’m actually a dude” they tend not to care, and we go about our business having a Men & Boys Hawaiian Shirts Cat Printed Short Sleeve Print Button Down Hawaiian Shirt. But those kinds of guys are few and far between. So yeah I’ve willingly put myself in the shoes of female gamers and I feel like it’s helped me understand the struggle a bit better than most guys, but I’ve considered myself a feminist for a long time and lurk in this sub quite a bit to try a familiarize myself with the common issues women deal with. I’ve seen a lot of the nasty shit y’all deal with from toxic male gamers first hand and it disgusts me. I’ve gotten the sexist remarks, graphically sexual comments, and rape threats. I feel like if more men play games like I do, they wouldn’t treat women with such disdain
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