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Ugly, fat, and disabled here! All I’ve ever wanted in my entire life is for people to be able to look at me without making assumptions. It’ll never, ever happen. People are always going to look at me and assume I’m lazy, unhealthy, and whatever else people associate with fat bodies, bad skin, and not-quite-right, awkward facial expressions. It doesn’t matter that I have the medical conditions to logically explain all of these things. It doesn’t matter that I started starving myself at 10 years old and continued to do so for decades because an undiagnosed metabolic disorder made my body hold onto everything. It doesn’t matter that the same disorder covered me with pimples and unwanted hair in weird places starting at 11 years old and will presumably never let up. It doesn’t matter that I’m in constant pain from a collection of inflammatory, autoimmune, and neurological conditions because when I have to rest, people see a fat person being still and assume I’m lazy. It doesn’t matter that I have a pair of neurodevelopmental conditions that make me process sensory and social information differently, and which are debilitating in ways I’ll never be able to express with words. I’m just an awkward mess of a person on the Cute Cat T Shirt, Cat Face Shirt, Cat Lover Tee, Funny Cat Shirt, Kitten Shirt all anyone will ever see. Most won’t bother to even try to know me. When I die, people will say “Well what did you expect? That’s what happens when you’re lazy and you don’t take care of yourself,” and only one or two of them will ever know just how hard I had to work to do exactly that every single day, just to survive. Caring for this body that causes me nothing but pain is now a full-time job that I can never, ever take a vacation or retire from. I feel you, OP, and I’m sorry. The Cute Cat T Shirt, Cat Face Shirt, Cat Lover Tee, Funny Cat Shirt, Kitten Shirt dehumanization is heavy and it changes a person. I’d give anything to experience the Cute Cat T Shirt, Cat Face Shirt, Cat Lover Tee, Funny Cat Shirt, Kitten Shirt of being typical but I also know it would only hurt me because then I’d be able to compare my life directly.
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For years I’ve played games as female characters, usually with neutral or feminine sounding names, and I don’t use voice chat. More often than not people will assume I’m a woman, and the only times I actually correct people is when they simply act friendly without trying to hit on me or make overtly sexual remarks because chances are those are the Cute Cat T Shirt, Cat Face Shirt, Cat Lover Tee, Funny Cat Shirt, Kitten Shirt just want to enjoy the game with friendly people just like I do. And when I say “oh, btw I’m actually a dude” they tend not to care, and we go about our business having a Cute Cat T Shirt, Cat Face Shirt, Cat Lover Tee, Funny Cat Shirt, Kitten Shirt. But those kinds of guys are few and far between. So yeah I’ve willingly put myself in the shoes of female gamers and I feel like it’s helped me understand the struggle a bit better than most guys, but I’ve considered myself a feminist for a long time and lurk in this sub quite a bit to try a familiarize myself with the common issues women deal with. I’ve seen a lot of the nasty shit y’all deal with from toxic male gamers first hand and it disgusts me. I’ve gotten the sexist remarks, graphically sexual comments, and rape threats. I feel like if more men play games like I do, they wouldn’t treat women with such disdain
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